Seven Avatars

Since I was small I had this idea of choreographing a dance which would include my favorite actresses and i have been waiting ever since for that dream to come true. The dance was supposed to take place at a prestigious event where the whole of the Bollywood community would be there and try to take in the extravaganza presented to them by moi.

Ive stuck to my obsession of the seven deadly sins.

So I kinda thought I'd reveal to you all who I think are perfect for the role and hopefully someday, someone famous reads this and tries to contact me to say "I wanna make this happen and I want you to be in charge of it"

Presenting to you, The Seven Avatars.The music to which this whole experience takes place is a song from Mynta which I also have developed a craze to obtain it since it was danced to by my puc college dance team but unfortunately to this day I am clueless of its name.

Luxuria/Lust - Shilpa Shetty or Nicole Scherzinger or Priyanka Chopra

Gula/Gluttony - Asin

Avaritia/Greed - Kareena Kapoor

Acedia/Sloth - Deepika Padukone

Ira/Wrath - Sushmita Sen

Invidia/Envy - Bipasha Basu

Superbia/Pride - Aishwarya Rai Bachchan

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A toast...

I was imagining this yesterday, surprisingly when I wasn't studying that too. This picture of all of my hostel mates sitting at a big cream colored banquet table with maroon table mats and white napkins in gold holders each of us being served red wine/champagne and a big shamiana over our head with the local singers, their songs floating in the breezy Goan air and to end this visual delight we were asked to toast to everyone separately. Saying a few words about 37 guys is definitely tough. I mean they are just people you hang around with while in hostel, chit chat , watch movies and then retire to your bedroom. But I figured having stayed there since August 15th, 2004 there has gotto be something I've appreciated in each of them, something to call their own. So here's what I was gonna say anyways...

His nimble fingers play away at the piano while he's forced to listen to off tune singing. His books, like God sends, he voraciously tears away. But amidst all the raucous and badminton, he stands apart as a bloody hard working Mal conformist who digs white, I mean really white chicks ;p (Nappi)

Never have I seen a guy who treats women and his bed the same... With RESPECT I mean you perverts. Part of the Three musketeers and also a fond restaurant goer which unfortunately finds him in the most holy of places... the bathroom. (Chocos)

With his tales of myth and reality, not forgetting he directed many of the in-hostel room plays is this guy who always finds a ray of hope in whatever he does. (GG)

I've heard he's a very good friend and is totally into movies. This critic of sorts doles out his honest opinions despite the shy guy he portrays outside. (3vik)

With looks and brains to match, this guy never fails to impress me with how lil I have actually studied before my exams. Thank you for making me realise that during those horrible exam times. (Kundapur)

Even though he's small I've often watched in amazement as this guy spins in and out of the mess queue without a scratch or bruise. And he also the Beckham mania seems to have hit him as I've noticed as of recent. (Krish)

I swear there'l never be dull moment with this guy around. His stories deliciously masalified and roasted, you'll be licking your fingers clean that is, if you have survived the laugh riot he'll set you on. (Abru)

Singh, undilah baisan, son of a mother father etc etc are all his alias'. Cricket and guitar crazy this curly haired, leg breaking dude leaves you always with a smile. (Singh, undilah baisan, son of a mother father.....)

Medium height, dark and handsome draped in basketball attire is also a very funny guy who can readily disarm you with his quick replies (Thoma)

This next guy is a God of sorts. All knowing, omnipresent and laptop-o-philic is known for going on and on from sports to politics to TV to music and the list will never end. Thanks for the all the trivia throughout the years (Who else can this be)

I'm sure all of us have feasted one day or the other on the food these two have in their rooms. From grandma baked cakes to biscuits and ice cold lemon tea we have had them all. Thank you for fattening us. (Schezwan chicken and YP)

One is a piano player and the other a nasal singer. Warden thought wisely putting these two together. May their walls be forever sound proofed and our ears heavily padded. Thank you for the music (Neyvelli and Himesh Miu Reshamiya)

Buff is just one word which completely describes him. Forever labouring after the coveted six pack, the same ones his idol Arjun Rampal doesn't have. (Denis the penance)

Mind blasting ideas, pj's and loads of fun to be with. His birthday surprises are always eagerly waited upon. (Pig)

Another room which needs soundproofing thanks to its deaf, 'sexual healing' meets 'any rap song' inhabitants. No thank you for the music. (Again you'll know very well who you'll are- (Sensitive & Pakao)

Stronger, bigger, faster, stronger. That's all what comes to my mind about my roommate. (LL Cool A)

My partner in all the crazy walk-a-thon's we have done. Not forgetting all the restaurants we have greedily invaded, all the topics in my textbook neatly marked and bitch sessions carefully listened to. Thank you, well basically for listening, wandering and being a bitch in need. (Shagger)

Laugh, laugh and some more laughs. And this isn't even at someone else, its at friggin me. His yapping, acting and entering rooms thru the lil window on top is just some of the millions he's done at hostel. (Stylo)

Another bitch in need is a bitch indeed, this one has heard it all. In great, extended and un-censored volumes. My idol and f*** buddy. (Duck)

Whenever his name comes to my mind, I always go back to the scene of first year bday celebrations and when the lights were switched of as some of us were shy to dance and then when it came one, this guy definitely had his freak going on. (Jetti)

Two sides of the mirror. One a traveller and the other a mugger. Its probably the differences which fated these two together. Plus I love the sweets one of them gets from the temples(Lord of waves/don/the man & Chancre)

From PUC in Blr to med coll in mlr, he's been with me. Hailed as the greatest cricketer of all, cant wait to see him on screen or as HOUSE. (Giri)

This master blaster of the batch, seriously can kick butt. Maheshbabu move aside for this dynamite. Hopefully I do see him someday, either directing, producing and definitely acting in the biggest blockbuster ever. Plus he has great hair. And I've seen the acting videos ;)(Entoi)

These two are definitely made for each other. One 6 foot hazard and the other a moustachioed love machine.(The love guru and the devotee)

Silent kill is all what I heard as he quietly waits to pounce for a kill. And his room mate is not bad either. Though not silent though, his laugh can be heard till the other end of hostel. (Shiv Seena)

One's the rapper champ and the other a book whiz. Even though one of them is born the same day as I was, wish I was as smart as him. (Champ & Koni)

Sent under the Queen's order this Australian is seriously a witty nag. Never boring, always smirking. (the name's Bond.. JoMoJo Bond)

With style unmatched and bottoms always up while asleep, these two bamboo boys we just cant enough. Especially the loud laughing during the afternoons while you'll relished the juicy gossip tastefully. Thank you for keeping us awake in the afternoons (Pee pee & Noop dogg)

And this whole episode ends with a delightful Goan meal.. Hmmm how I wish it were all true.
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Vanilla... cut and dried

Sis with her mates on either side


Aaarrggghhhhmmmmm... or something like that, is the sound that emanates from the serous chambers of my throat as I get up from behind the sheets and survey the room. I notice from the noise coming from outside my door, the gushing, the rambling and the "oh my God's" that sis is up already. Such a fool, she sacrifices a good 10 hours sleep just to get up, face wash, moisturise, tweak and mascara, kajal and straighten her already Cosmo designed beauty. Heck , I'm not complaining. What's there for guys like us. Get up, take a leak, brush, comb and pick up random attire from the carpeted floor and done, saving the shades for last, of course, before I ride off to college.

She's got an interview today. No wonder all the extra add-on's. I can only imagine her signing the old anthem of Indian girls worldwide "banoonge mein, Miss India". Kingfisher does have a certain edge compared to other airlines. But I shudder to imagine my sister, a once 100 kilo moti gulab jamun now a svelte long legged lass on her airline with her mates, making announcements, serving guests, flirting with the pilots and charting of to London, Rome, Paris spending lavishly on perfumes and haute couture not to forget the cigarettes she'd be downing to relieve all the stress.I'll miss her though. No one to bug then when I'm back from college.

St. Xavier's, College of Arts. Yes, I know. You'll probably think I'm some loser who wasn't smart enough to make it through the rigorous equations and chemical potions and botanical jargon or zoological dissections but I did. In fact scored 92% percent, thank you very much. But that's not what I was meant to do. While I saw all my friends rushing off to IIT or medical concentration camps, I on the other hand just took my certificates and was immediately offered the desired course of Journalism, the art of writing, speaking and conveying everything publicly and hopefully uniquely.

Ever since my mom died and dad having left us for younger cheesecakes, Grandma has always labored on surreptitiously to make us have the finer things. Not that our Granddad didn't leave behind enough back from his Merchant Navy days. Our house may have been one of the old timers but whatever we did was in style. Why we ate off plates which had the insignia of the ship my Granddad was a chef on. My grandma still makes English breakfasts every Sunday, though not as good as to what Granddad used to since his ingredients were all imported from England each time his ship stopped by at Mangalore.

Even my cousins and uncle and aunties, practically everyone showed up save the neighbors who though we were a snooty lot showing off like proud peacocks but to hell with them anyways. I miss those days. Everything is so fast paced now. Running of to college, classes, assignments, projects, fests and then there's the nerve wrecking job interview tackling to prove that your different from the billion other aspiring Tagore's, Adiga's or Rushdie's. "Bye Dev, I'm of. Wish me luck na stupid. Your sister might just be one of the air goddess' on Kingfisher airlines. I might even introduce you to the girls, if I get in" she winks. "All the best Zizou" I smile and then proceed to freshen up.

Zizou, a nickname which stood ever since she was 10 and had this non stop fact dishing and picture collecting of Zinedine Zidane's glorious football carrier. All that stopped after the head butt though. "He's so mean ya, but the other guy deserved it no??" Somehow aggressiveness always put off Zi. She never used to play with any of the kids who shoved or pushed and even if they did, she'd just run to their parents who would then gloriously shower their children with verbose chiding and bum meets scale techniques. After that she'd just walk away. Smiling away to glory at her accomplishment of saving the world from the bullies.

My sweet, charming, spectacle wearing (replaced with grey contacts now though), plump (now a size 6, after her idol Gisele Bündchen, whom I used to drool over every time Zi got a magazine with her on it), saving the world from bullies Zizou. The sms alert rings. 'My turn is coming up... Pls pray for me :) muah.' How I hate her muahs. Its sounds like these pretentious rich ladies who drool on about how rich they are and then gulp champagne and eat caviar from golden spoons, all the time mocking the poor beggars who cross the street. Anyways, I utter a prayer and then head off to college. Hopefully something exciting happens today...
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I've finally decided. I'm a heart person. Anything to do with love and the whole jambola of emotions, are all right up my alley. I guess its got to be due to having read the horoscopes and having promptly mugged up all the characteristics of the humble Cancerian and having diligently executed it in my life, ever since I was small.

I don't think there's not a single characteristic I dont fit into. Lets see there's shy, timid, withdrawn, dull but only at times, home loving, obstinately tenacious, purposeful, energetic, intuitive and wise, sometimes with a philosophical profundity of thought verging on inspiration, sympathetic and kindly sensitivity to other people, especially those they love.

I tend to be over-imaginative and prone to fantasy, sometimes trying to shape my life to fit some romantic ideal. I am appreciative of art and literature, and especially of drama.

Mentally, a mixture of toughness and softness, often emotional and romantic to the point of sentimentality in fantasies; but in real life the loving is not so sentimental but tenaciously loyal. I am also too easily influenced by those they love and admire, and swayed by the emotion of the moment.

Having a retentive memory, particularly for emotionally laden events which I can recall in detail for years afterwards. Being strongly governed by childhood memories and since I live intensely in the past in memory and in the future in imagination, a chance meeting with someone for whom they had an unrequited love, even if they thought they had conquered the feeling, will easily rouse the emotion all over again.

Now hasn't that happened before eh??
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Time of my Life

6:15pm... Hmmm, time certainly passes quickly when your having fun. Well, I wouldn't classify my present situation which involves sitting cross legged on my bed, with my textbook resting on a pillow, sorta like how the magic lamp in Aladdin was placed and day dreaming about the romantic possibilities of a relationship with certain so and so's, as ecstatic, but should do for the time being.

Then there's the, 'oh my God, I've put on so much frigging weight that the shirt I paid 700 bucks for is gonna suffer fo sure if I couldn't wear it to the Farewell. Quick Sms note made on my mobile should do the trick. "LOOSE WEIGHT FOR SHIRT TO LOOK GOOD". Yes, weird as it sounds, the shirt has become a second skin for which I have to loose the many other skins just for it to be special for just one day. Superficial, you say. Stuff it. We have all gone through the phase. Well not the genetically modified fat burning perfect body ones though. UURRGGHH hate them for their genes and jeans.

What topic should I put up on my blog? hmmm... Crow has gone and written something dope as usual that the 30 something readers who vociferously read her work have all commented while I sit here like an old lady on my hunches churning epic after epic of chutney for the various people who do show up only to chance upon the pics I've up or to read a few lines and then disappear like electric pink cotton candy in ones mouth. Thankfully for the FEEDJIT, I now know that people all over the world stop by, but still. Where is the love? where are the comments? I have nothing to show my competing curly bed haired smudged kajal wearing rani anything. While she grows better and better. The torture of it all, I tell you.

"I wanna make love in this club 'ey, in this club 'ey in this club 'ey
I wanna make love in this club 'ey, in this club 'ey in this club 'ey"
It blares again bringing me back. The freaking song that haunts me everyday as for my neighbors for whom "music is life" holds good as their motto. With a smirk on my face I quickly contemplate the plan of action. Lets see, I have the keys to their room. I could sneak in while they are gone, hack the wires of their speakers with a knife and leave with my legendary smirk and probably a laugh to go with the triumph of having "stopped the music". But alas AGAIN I whip out my trusty Nokia, go to messages, new message, text message, volume!!!, enter number, send message, 1299 messages left in current balance. And the deed is done. The volume fades leaving behind bass notes which thump the creaking tiled floor.

It is a condition in which... uuurggh. This is crap. SLAM the book goes and pushed away to the dusty corner of the table. 7pm I'm hungry. Wish I could order some pizza. Quickly I rush to reminders "LOOSE WEIGHT FOR SHIRT TO LOOK GOOD!!!". Screw it. I slide back against the 125 year old white washed walls and think if only I were a regular. I would be an intern. Busy with work. Free to roam, to gym, to eat, to dance, to eat. 2 more months.. 2 more loooonng months.

"Coming for dinner?" Sagar asks. Dressed in his coat and steth wrapped like a serpent on Shiva. "uhuh" I reply and shuffle into my chappals and then head to wash my plate in the E.coli infected waters. And then I head to bitter reality. The mess hall... dammit
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